My strategy for lesbian internet dating

My strategy for internet dating

What made me consider her – she made reference to my profile

She made first contact so remember be hard to get!!!

She could be a serial killer or man pretending to be a woman or worse fat and ugly with bad skin.

I might throw up.

Try not to show revulsion immediately. Try to maintain some sort of conversation going. Try to like the person.

The old white woman person first – give her a chance it’s not like you have anything better going on.

And do not have sex or sexual relationship and do not convince yourself you are in love and wait for communication etc.

That is so uncool. But let her paint your nails. Better get back on to the vitamins and try and sort out those weak nails.

You know you are too easy but don’t go crazy trying to be too hard.

To keep a "Shugamama" you have leave something back. She is not your friend. She probably just wants some jungle fever.

See how come she can get a young catch and you only get old dried prunes?

Learn and apply bitch! 

Watch this space, I smell a train wreck if the plane even gets off the ground right? (I know mixed metaphors)